Mountain Climbing: Survivor 101

“I’m comin’ up on the rough side of the mountain,

I must hold to God, His powerful hand,

I’m comin’ up on the rough side of the mountain,

I’m doing my best to make it in.”

~Rev F C Barnes

I wanted to figure out how I could best tie in today’s topic and its analogy. I’m a visual learner and often make use of analogies or comparisons to increase my own understanding and comprehension. I’m sure you have picked up on that trend with my previous topics :o)

The lyrics above are from a song I remember hearing on television when I was little. The song, “Rough Side of The Mountain,” always provided me with a visual of someone trekking up a steep mountain, attempting to reach its peak. Do you have an image of someone ascending a mountain? Good. Keep that visual.

A friend of mine once shared his journey of finding Christ. This friend stated that he ran from salvation for years although deep inside he felt a pressing need to seek God’s will/path. This friend admitted that his stubbornness led him down a dark and painful path. It wasn’t until an acquaintance delivered an almost prophetic message that this young man began to pay attention. You see, during a conversation the acquaintance simply stated, “God wants you. Now, He can get you by choice or by force.” This acquaintance meant that because God is so powerful, whatever He speaks into existence, the same will be done. My friend had the choice to take the easy way or the hard way.

Now make no mistake about it, God still gives us free will. In my friend’s case, because he was so stubborn- although he felt Christ calling, he still chose to turn away. That choice led to a lot of heartache and pain. Unnecessary heartache and pain. In the end, my friend found Christ and is immensely happy now, but at what cost?

Some people argue that the outcome, the end product, is the most important. Basically, it doesn’t matter how you get there, as long as you get there.

Well, the issue with that mentality, especially where God is concerned, is the outcome has already been decided. God’s words become bond (which is another reason why we shouldn’t take the Lord’s name in vain or use it so loosely- but that’s another discussion).

So if you know the outcome- better yet, the path, the plan, the final product- wouldn’t logic tell you to take the straightest route? Wouldn’t sense teach you to carry out the necessary steps to reach that outcome?

As saints, or even if you have been debating if you should seek Christ, it is a fact that those who seek Christ already have the victory….in Jesus’ name. Because Christ overcame the world, those who seek Him, believe in Him, and accept Him into their lives have the victory as well. In Jesus’ name, we are sealed and protected:

“that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life. For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved.”

John 3:15-17

“These things I have spoken unto you that in me ye might have peace. In the world, ye shall have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.”

John 16:33

What a marvelous outcome!

So what sense does it make to take detours and pit stops along the journey? While I do believe the journey or the experience is important, I believe it’s equally important to be smart about the path you decide to take.

Why get sidetracked when we already have the plan or outcome before us?

Well from my experience it’s been a result of doubting that outcome. I didn’t believe I already had the victory. I mean, I didn’t do anything to deserve it, so why would it be that simple?

That concept is common in a lot of societies: those who are fortunate or successful have earned it. They worked earnestly and steadfastly; they achieved it. If you look up the definition behind achieve it would list “to accomplish; to get or attain by effort; to obtain.” We have been brought up in most societies to believe that the victor gets the victory through hard, good, earnest work, while those who are lazy are unaccomplished or unsuccessful. Those who catch a break are considered “lucky” and are even viewed negatively because they didn’t do anything to earn their reward; they didn’t deserve it.

I can say in most earthly circumstances that concept has validity. I can even go as far as to say that I didn’t do anything to earn my salvation. But please keep in mind we’re not talking about an earthly entity. We’re talking about the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

The Holy Trinity is not of this world, so earthly laws need not apply. Would you like to know another thing? After you accepted Jesus into your life you became a new self that is unearthly too:

“That ye put off concerning the former conversation the old man, which is corrupt according to deceitful lusts: And be renewed in the spirit of your mind: And that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness.”

Ephesians 4: 22-24

So yes, I had to accept that I already had the victorious outcome because of Jesus Christ. Thus, pit stops and detours are not needed or necessary and are, in fact, counterproductive. I will get to the outcome regardless, so it makes perfect, logical sense to take the straightest path to reach the peak.

Now that we’ve covered the outcome, let’s talk about paths. We have two options: our will or His will. Both are paths and both involve journeys. Here are a few things I’ve learned:

1) My path leaves me at the mercy of dangerous traps and snares, while God’s path provides 100% protection.

Because God loves me, I learned that He will still protect me even when I decided to go down my own path. Yes, He cares that much! However, it’s typically in the form of catching me before I fall off a cliff or became completely ensnared. Think Batman, Superman, or better yet, MacGyver- the heroes who always come in the nick of time to save the day.

Although God catches me before I plummet to grave valleys, I still end up with injuries, scraps, and bruises due to my foolish need to insert my own independence. What I learned: FREE WILL + IGNORANCE= DISASTER!!!

2) I typically don’t make any lead way on my own path.

Basically, I don’t break any new ground. More so, I find myself walking in circles. A prime example: Due to some circumstances in my life I disclosed to my mother that I felt I was turning my wheels and getting nowhere.

In fact, it seemed that as soon as I decided to seek God’s will, I was brought back to the same place I started. God had been attempting to guide me, however like my friend, I allowed my stubbornness and need for independence to dictate where I wanted to go. Fortunately, God heard my cry, my request for His will to be done and guided me back to the right point where His path led.

Let me emphasize this important factor: I must choose to follow His path/His will in order to prevent falling back into the circle-walking routine.

Does that make sense? I hope it does, because I feel it has been the deciding factor between climbing up the mountain and just circling around it.

Now, because of God’s power and grace, He is able to take our will (ie walking in circles) and use it as a learning process. Maybe you discover skills you never thought of. Maybe you come across someone who can assist or help you along your journey. Maybe that person even accompanies you during your journey.

However make no mistake about it: You will come back to the same point or fork in the road you first started on. You will be going in circles.

Because I’m human, I know I’m going to make mistakes. Rather, it’s what I learn from those mistakes that will determine how straight, or rocky, my path will be to get to the peak or reach the outcome. My latest detour (walking in circles) lasted a year.

A year!

While I’m appreciative of that journey- I discovered some survival skills to assist me along the way and I also met some wonderful people who have provided positive companionship during the journey as well- I can’t help but to think: “Wow, did I really waste a year?”

Now, while I’m too optimistic to view any experience as a waste, I do want to learn from my detour so that I won’t be likely to take a similar path down the road.

This takes me to my final lesson:

3) I need God’s discernment to ensure I get to the right path and stay on it.

With each path, my will/path versus God’s will/path, there will be tribulation and strife. Again make no mistake about it, a life of a saint is not an easy one, but it is rewarding and very necessary. His path will take me to new heights and elevation. Mine?? Yeah, I got over my “scenic” route rather quickly :o)

And there lies the difference between both paths: one path will take me to victory and the other will provide a delay. The journey down God’s path will always bring a heighten, elevated breakthrough or stage. While I will face steepness and rocky roads during my trek up the mountain, God has assured me I will overcome them through Christ. Not only will He prepare me with the necessary tools to face a rocky point in the journey, His blessings will elevate me higher so that I’m closer to reaching His peak.

So with this in mind, His path calls for complete trust. In order to get us to that mountaintop, we have to trust Him. We mustn’t become afraid or begin to doubt whenever we face rockiness or adversity. A lion may cross our path, but God will provide the means to overcome it (think about David). And if God’s path requires that you climb up the rough side of the mountain, please remember you’re climbing up to His glorious outcome.

Be blessed saints!

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you an expected end.”

Jeremiah 29:11

God's Will: The Ultimate Collaboration

It's so funny how I landed on today's topic today. Well, not funny, more so, strange (I call everything funny or interesting- force of habit).

I was sitting down doing my budget. Cringe! I've gotten in the habit of not worrying as much and simply focusing on the now and present. Tomorrow's burdens will take care of itself when that time comes. Plus, I can look at my past and recognize that I have made it through times I first thought were simply impossible. God has been consistent- He has taken care of me. I praise Him and thank Him. That mentality sort of helped to transition me into today's topic. I'll break down the sequences because sometimes on the outside looking in, it may seem that I jump around a lot.

Okay, to help me focus on today and not worry about tomorrow and those struggles I had to remind myself to focus on God:

"But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you." Matthew 6:33

Well that led me to think about God and doing His will. So I began to ask myself questions:

1. What's my job? Well, I first landed at glorifying His name.

In relation to that first question I wondered:

2. What's my role, more specifically as it pertains to God's will.

I had to challenge myself to look at the bigger picture. What exactly was the bigger picture and where was I in the grand scheme of things?

And that's whereI got stumped...

I needed to marinate on this one a little bit- What exactly is God's will? So of course I started researching into various sites and scriptures regarding God's will. I landed on one particular site: Scripture on God's Will (http://psalm40.org/verses.html) and read a few scriptures from that site.

I must admit that I was still stumped until I came across a set of scriptures:

"having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will,

to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved.

In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace

which He made to abound toward us in all wisdom and prudence,

having made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He purposed in Himself,

that in the dispensation of the fullness of the times He might gather together in one all things in Christ, both which are in heaven and which are on earth- in Him.

In Him also we have obtained an inheritance, being predestined according to the purpose of Him who works all things according to the counsel of His will,

that we who first trusted in Christ should be to the praise of His glory."

Ephesians 1:5-12

From that set, two scriptures stuck out- "having made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He purposed in Himself" and

"In Him also we have obtained an inheritance, being predestined according to the purpose of Him who works all things according to the counsel of His will".

Since my background is in counseling I, of course, zoned right in on that word "counsel." Anyone who is familiar with counseling, is probably aware of the dynamics of that relationship between the counselor and client. It's typically a friendly, bi-directional relationship set in a safe, welcoming and non-judgmental atmosphere. The counselor and client typically work, or collaborate together to meet the goals established at the beginning of that relationship. Both counselor and client become acquainted with other and acknowledge that power struggles do not exist within that relationship or setting. Simply put, it's two people with a common goal: walk together through whatever journey gets created by their dynamics. It's a team. An unit. A collaboration.

That's when my wheels began to turn.

In order for me to do things according to God's will, I must walk with God, become familiar and acquainted with Him.

Let me stop for a moment to tell you about a very special person in my life: my best friend. She's the "Frick" of my "Frack." Sometimes it seems as if I know exactly what she's thinking. Sometimes she even finishes my sentences for me. How? Because we have gotten to know each other. We have shared and disclosed things; we have spent time together.

From the beginning, it almost appeared that we were somehow, magically on the same wavelength. Yes, even from the start. It was a very natural and easy transition into our friendship.

Wanna hear some really exciting news? The same can be said about Christ. Because He is in me, we're on the same wavelength:

"having made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He purposed in Himself, that in the dispensation of the fullness of the times He might gather together in one all things in Christ, both which are in heaven and which are on earth- in Him."

Ephesians 1:9-10.

Thus, God and I are already on the same wavelength. So that part of the "battle" is already accomplished and me, as a mere human, really didn't do much work (just believed in Christ and accepted Him into my life).

The next part, to me, has been the hardest though. I actually have to allow Him, listen to Him. Continually. Consciously.

Why has this been hard, especially given the fact that I continually ask Him, tell Him, give Him permission to completely reign over me and use me how He sees fit?

Well, this request is different from other prayers, I feel. You see, God gave us His word of free will. That particular aspect of His word (free will) doesn't necessarily work like a permanent contract though.

Okay, you know those contracts that you sign with a business or service and acknowledge that the entity may change their conditions within the working relationship (ie the date they take out their payment from your banking account, when the actual bill or statement is due, any "extra" fees that may come up where they would charge you). You know, those contracts. And as long as they give you the heads-up before it happens- and yes it will happen regardless- you acknowledge your agreement with those terms.

Have you ever had that happen to you- where you find yourself looking over your bill and think "Where did that come from?" or "Why did they change that?"

How did you feel afterwards? Cheated? Conned? Did you feel that particular business was sneaky and consequently gave yourself a "Time to wise up to the game" lecture? I did.

Well God doesn't work like that. Praise Him! He doesn't pop up and show you the contract you foolishly signed months ago and say, "Remember when you signed here, here, and here and initialed there and there? Well you gave me permission to do so..."

God's not sneaky. God's very open. Why? Because He loves you. He loves me. So although He has the power to do whatever He wants, He's loving enough to let us collaborate with Him. He really does care about our opinions and insight.

It's so funny- a few weeks ago I had this dream where I was talking to God. It was an actual conversation too. Not like the ones I've had with my friends where I'm half listening or not even listening at all because I'm just waiting on that person to shut up so I can make my point.

Oh don't act like you've never done it :o)

Well, in this conversation, I could feel, sense, that God was asking questions out of genuine curiosity. He really wanted to get my opinion on the topic. Even more so, He reallyconsidered my comments afterwards. He gave them serious thought before He said, "Okay."

Yup, that's the God we serve!

So to go back to my point- we have to allow God into my lives and decisions. That's part of the collaboration. He's never going to force us- He doesn't work that way. He would be going against His own word of free will, which is impossible for God.

So yes it would be simple to say, "Okay God, use me. I give you free reign" and then step back and let Him perform His works. But think about it like this: if God did all work, you wouldn't be necessary or needed. Your role would be of no importance. And always remember you do have a role....I have a role. And yes, you are important to God...I'm important to God.

So, yes we have to make a conscious decision each and every time. Each and every moment. Each and every minute to allow God to work through us. Again, it's collaboration, not dictatorship.

This is where I have always gotten stumped though. I sincerely wanted to do His will, I just didn't know what He will was....

But the bible called me out on my bluff: "having made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He purposed in Himself,"

Because Jesus sacrificed Himself in order to give up His precious spirit, so that all who believe in Him would have that spirit within them, I do have the information within me.

I've been been taught that God gave us everything we need to survive in this realm. To survive through the struggles and trials. And He did- through Jesus Christ:

"These things I have spoken unto you that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation but be of good cheer: I have overcome the world." John 16:33

I have the knowledge and the wisdom to do His will, but because it's His will, I need to communicate with Him. That's the piece I was missing...

That's why I would become so frustrated and cry out, "I can't hear you! You won't tell me Your will so I can do it."

And that's when I had to call my own bluff and say, "He has planted the will in you, thus you know it. And better yet- how to get to it. You're just too lazy, and scared, but lazy to go after it."

Yeah, the truth isn't always so easy to swallow :o/

Where does this fear come from? Well, I truly believe in Him and His power. In the last few months alone He has revealed some BIG and HEAVY things to me. And I know He hasn't even put a tiny dent in showing His breadth or width even after all of that. While that fascinates me, it also scares me.

Where does the laziness come from? That fear. I have always kept within my comfort zone. It was safe. It was familiar. It was comfy. At first I thought I didn't push myself because of fear of rejection- my perfectionism wouldn't be able to handle the disappointment or let down.

But now, I know it was because of my fear of what I could do. My possibilities. My success. I wasn't scared of failing, I was scared of flying. That fear of allowing God to expand my breadth and width almost paralyzed me. Please note that I said almost.

Do you remember a while back when I shared my dream about flying? Well that's what I feel I can do. Not because of me, but because of Him. Because I have God. Thing is, God will only work miracles based on how much I trust Him... how much I allow Him....how much Icollaborate with Him:

"Therefore He who supplies the Spirit to you and works miracles among you, does He do it by the works of the law, or by the hearing of faith?" Galatians 3:5

So how do we walk this journey? We're already on the same wavelength because of Christ. That map is already instilled in us. In me. But I have to become familiar with it. Like my relationship with my best friend I have to spend time with God. I have to read God's word, the bible. I have to meditate on His word. I have to fast so I can hear His voice more clearly. I have to talk to Him constantly.

Have you ever spend hours on the phone with your best friend? Females may nod their heads more readily than males :o) During these conversations you and your friend talk about everything and absolutely nothing at the same time. You share your dreams, your fears, your joy and your pain. You call her up just to tell her about something that happened earlier that day that was so funny or silly. Sometimes the conversations last only a minute- just a quick "Oh my gosh- I gotta tell you what just happened!"

And sometimes you're just silent because words are not necessary. Over time, your friendship grows, deepens. You find yourself immediately going to that friend over every little thing. And there's no such thing as secrets.

I find that I go to my best friend because I know she'll listen, give sage advice, and/or cheer me up. And she'll do all of that with 0% judgment and 100% care.

Well God is like that, but better! Infinitely better!

How quickly I find myself calling my best friend, I have to do that with God. My best friend's number is on speed dial; God's accessibility is even more open. He's always available. I just have to reach out to Him. I just have to communicate with Him. I just have tocollaborate with Him.

I look forward to the moment when I can readily pick up His thoughts for me. When I can readily finish His sentences directed towards me...

Be blessed saints! I leave on this scripture:

"Have I not commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed. For the LORD, thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest."

Joshua 1:9

Smudged Mirrors...Blurry Images

Have you ever found yourself using the sleeve of your shirt to clean a mirror? Maybe you're in the bathroom and the mirror is fogged up after a hot shower.

Or what about pictures??? Have you ever had to tilt your head sideways because you were attempting to make out what image you were looking at? It was so blurry that you didn't know if you were staring at a thumb or Big Foot :o)

Earlier I was looking through some pictures and I thought, "Man! If only this picture came out better! It's so blurry!"

Some things are certain: smudged mirrors don't show clear reflections and blurry images don't provide accurate portrayals.

Because I have embraced my role as a saint, I have really given serious scrutiny regarding the image I'm portraying. I'm supposed to be the salt and light of the world, right? My actions are supposed to glorify Him, right?

Okay, let me stop and provide some intimate details about myself: I'm a perfectionist. Yup, that's right- I said it. Hi, nice to meet you, I'm a perfectionist. And as a perfectionist, I challenged myself to do the best and be the best. When I succeeded, I felt great. When I didn't make the bar- you guessed it, I was my own worse critic. Well fortunately I started to work on my relationship with God and recognize that while I'm not perfect, in Christ I'm made whole and complete.

Now as a saint, you would think that I immediately stopped beating myself up and accepted that I was good enough because I had Christ. As a saint, you would think that I could now lay off the pressure just a wee bit because I now have a solid and consistent foundation in Christ. Right???

Wrong! Ha!

Let's just say that I'm a reforming perfectionist and I'm slowly, but surely, letting go and letting God. W.I.P. (work in progress) as I like to call it and yes I am making progress!

So being the reforming perfectionist I am, you can see how seriously I took my salting job, huh? Lol! Oh, I wanted to salt the whole world! Part of my reason for publicly documenting my journey was that I wanted people, who were just like me, to see my up's and downs, my high's and my struggles, and want to seek a closer to relationship to God too. That somehow, people could feel my joy and elation over the web and become thirsty for that intimacy with our Heavenly Father.

Can I share another intimate detail about myself? Even as a perfectionist I bomb in the tact department. For some reason for as long as I could remember, I could never keep my mouth shut at the right times! I would blurt things out before thinking about them. And I'll admit that it's still a W.I.P. Just this very week I found myself reacquainting my foot to my mouth!

So after yet another "Doh" moment, I wondered if I was actually doing a good job at seasoning. I questioned if I was truly in a position to be an example for others. I questioned if people would say that they saw Christ whenever they looked in me.... I began to wonder if my own mirror was smudged.

Can I share one last intimate detail about myself?

My mirror is smudged. While I pray over and over for God to use me to glorify Him, I find that I still struggle with my smudged mirror. Oh, I begin to doubt if I'm clear enough. If I'm clean enough that people can look through my reflection and see God.

So what does the perfectionist in me do? Well, that perfectionist attempts to clean that smudged mirror herself. Using my sleeve, I attempt to polish that reflection until it's spot less and it glistens.

Have you ever tried to clean a dirty mirror with a dirty sleeve? Not really effective, huh?

Although it seems almost instinctual to go into damage control- after I make a mistake or say something silly, I immediately attempt to correct the situation myself. But I find that not only do I goof up the situation more (ie my mirror becomes even more smudged), but I also find myself retracing my steps to seek God and ask for His help, His forgiveness- oh, and His wonderful glass cleaner....

The fortunate thing I can say is that God is so amazing that He and only He can turn messes into blessings. Only God can correct the mistakes I've made and also deter me from future mistakes. But I have to allow Him to do so...

I realized that my need for clear perfectionism, my need to be certain at all times I am spot-less and accurately reflecting Him only led to me blurring the lenses. You're probably thinking, "Well shouldn't you seek to be spot-less, or sin less? Shouldn't you seek to accurately reflect Him and His love?"

Well, yes.

The difference was that my focus was off. Instead of focusing on Him, I focused on my need to be clear. I focus on my own actions and thus, I began to doubt myself. Instead of simply praying that God would use me, and then focus on Him (believing that He heard me and would answer my prayer), I shifted my focus back to myself- scrutinizing my every step and word. The consequence: blurry images.

I realize that it's only when I step back, when I trust that God can take my words and actions-yes even the times when I goof up- that He can turn them into miracles that all glorify Him. Only God can clear my smudged mirror so that He shines through....reflects through. And what glass cleaner does He use? Jesus Christ!

Praise Him!

So two sets of scriptures I want to leave on that help to color my perspective. The first set is to show what a wonderful and perfect glass cleaner (ie Savior) we have in Jesus. The second set is to show that your mirror will continue to need cleaning (ie W.I.P.)

"Even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ, (by grace ye are saved;) And hath raised us up together, and made us sit together in heavenly places in Christ Jesus: That in the ages to come he might show the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness toward us through Christ Jesus. For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:"

~Ephesians 2: 5-8

"Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:"

~Philippians 1:6

Be blessed saints! :o)

Dreams 101

To say the last couple of weeks have been interesting would be putting it mildly :o)

Even as I type at this very moment, the word, "Boldly" keeps repeating itself in my head. This same word led me to write this blog for today. It wasn't until I came across these verses just now, that everything made sense:

"And for me, that utterance may be given unto me, that I may open my mouth boldly, to make known the mystery of the gospel, For which I am an ambassador in bonds: that therein I may speak boldly as I ought to speak." Ephesians 6:19-20.

Okay, I'm going to have a moment of vulnerability here and disclose some things... For the last two weeks, I've had the most vivid, incredible dreams almost on a nightly basis. It wasn't until I came across a friend the other day, that I started to marinate on sharing these dreams. Thing is, my friend and I have had very similar dreams; not only that, but it seemed that our dreams occurred during the same time, even on the same night. See what I meant by saying "interesting"? Lol!

I hesitated to share my dreams with you b/c at first I simply thought they were messages specifically for me, meaning that I would only benefit from them. Honestly, I became even doubtful of how people would view me after I disclosed these dreams. But after that word "boldly" crept into my mind, I couldn't deny that I needed to share this with you. Besides, I figured, I'm beyond caring what people think of me now. It's all about my Heavenly Father....

Plus, after speaking to my friend, I believe I would be selfish to keep these messages to myself. I believe these messages could be beneficial to others. Let me first give out a disclaimer: the fact that I remember these dreams the day after, even more so, several days later, is miraculous! Usually I'll remember a few details and then everything becomes a blur, but I can still recall them- they were that amazing.

So, are you comfy? Are you settled? Okay, here we go!

Dream one: This dream occurred on Feb. 5th (Sunday night) , if my memory serves me correctly. Have you ever had a dream where you played witness inside of your own dream? Like you were watching yourself as a third party/on-looker. Well, I've had previously. On this night I felt myself being lifted up where I could float through the air. Unlike my previous dreams where I would get scared and wake up before I could see where I was going, in this dream, I allowed myself to let go. I knew I was being pulled by someone higher, greater than me- God. I remember thinking, "Lord, if this is You, I will follow you." Immediately I felt this euphoria, because I was finally able to let go fully and trust Him; trust that God would lead me and would protect me no matter what. Let me disclose that this is the first time I have truly given myself over to God and say "Use me. Lead me. I will follow You!" My dream continued as I was lifted into the air and the sky. It was so beautiful seeing all the stars! Now, honestly, I thought this was my homecoming; I thought God was calling me home (and yes I was so excited).

Then, I felt myself drop....

Okay, let me give a little backdrop to the dropping part. This isn't the first time I've had a dream where I fell from the sky. I will be honest and admit that I really wasn't fond of this type of dream b/c I always felt the affects of the falling. Have you ever been on a rollercoaster and was plunged downward quickly, causing your stomach to flip flop? Yeah, well that's what my falling dreams always felt like. I could literally feel my stomach turning over in this dreams- very uncomfortable. Well, in this particular dream, I started to prepare myself for the uncomfortable feelings, however my mentality was "The Lord is with me, so I'll be okay. I know He will catch me." As soon as I thought this, it seemed as if time froze and I gently, slowly fell through the sky. There were no uncomfortable tummy flip flops!

This was another pivotal part because for the first time I wasn't afraid of falling or failing anymore. I trusted that whatever life handed me, the ups and downs, God would be there to catch me. I finally trusted in His word "I will never forsake you...." Amazing huh? I woke up shortly afterwards and pulled a Swiper move (from Dora) and said "Aww, man!"

Lol, I was disappointed because I thought I was being called home, but I immediately became grateful because I was still living. He blessed me with another day. And ever since that dream, every time I wake up in the morning, I quickly send my praise and thanks up to God because He blessed me with another day on this earth. It seems every since the death of Whitney Houston, I'm even more aware of how precious time on Earth is. While I look forward to the moment when Jesus comes back, I am appreciative of any moment I get to spend on Earth. As the song and scripture would say, "Today is the day that the Lord hath made. I would be glad and rejoice in it."

Did you like that dream? Thought you might :o) I can say how incredible it feels to let go and let God. Okay, are you ready for the next one?? Let's go!

Dream two: Feb 11 (Saturday night): Several things happened, and I remember being on a journey, but I came across a man who was familiar to me, as in I recognized him and joined in conversation with him, but physically I knew I had never seen this man before (like I haven't met him).

Well, in one part of the dream, I dreamt I was being chased by snakes. I think this one was a python. Now, anyone who knows me knows how much I hate snakes. And it was fast! Lol, I'm no sprinter, but even in my dream I gave Jesse Owens and Flo Jo a run for their money. But I remember the snake was leaping through the air right behind me.

I managed to get away...

Well, I came across my friend again and I told him about the snakes and I asked him if he saw the snake and if the snake tried to attack him too. Well, he said, yes, he saw the snake and yes the snake attempted to attack him. So I asked, "What did you do?" And he simply said that the snake approached him, however stopped at his heel and then left. Later on in my dream I thought about what my friend had said and was debating going to find the snake and see/test if he would stop at my heel too, but I decided against it. I woke up from that dream shortly afterwards.

Well it wasn't until the following evening that this verse came to my head: "Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you." Luke 10:19

I recognized earlier on that the serpent was sin, but it didn't register until God put that verse in my head. It didn't make sense until then (and please note that God uses our mind to communicate with us "By the renewing of our minds...." or more specifically "And be renewed in the spirit of your mind." Esphesians 4:23).

Maybe the man was Jesus in my dream. It makes sense to say so since he was familiar to me, but yet I had never seen him. Yes, I will claim it, He was Jesus.

I guess the thing is, I still battle fear of this world, instead of fearing and resting in God. I ran away from sin, thinking "Whew! I was able to escape the claws of sin another day!" Instead of facing my sin and saying "No."

How straightforward can He get you may wonder... Oh it gets even better. Ready for my last dream?

Dream three: Which is a multiple-part dream which first started on Feb 13 and continued onto Feb 14 (Monday and Tuesday nights). On Feb 13, I dreamt that I was again on a journey and I travelled into a new city and I automatically thought, "New Jerusalem."

The next dream is even more special because this dream is similar to the one my friend had on the same night: I remember being in a place that was not on earth. It was more so in space; I had to look down to see earth. My friend stated that his dream was similar.

Well, I also dreamt that I was privvy to meetings with important political leaders, all who were discussing the future and path of this world. It was a very somber mood; sadly it wasn't a

discussion to better the state of the world and its affairs.

Again, I woke up feeling peaceful, relieved, and yet surprised. I woke up again, praising God because He allowed me to see another day.

Honestly, I do not know when that time will come, when Jesus will return. I do have a pressing need, an urge to speak boldly and loudly, not caring what others might think. Two things I want to say before I end:

1) Please stop, yes at this very moment, and evaluate yourself and circumstances. If you are unsure of your future. If you are uncertain where you will spend your spiritual eternity...If you do not know where you would go- be it heaven or hell- when you die, please, I ask you, stop whatever you are doing and ask for salvation. Repent, ask for forgiveness, and profess that you believe in Jesus Christ. Profess that you believe He died at the cross and rose 3 days later so that your sins may be forgiven and washed away. Profess that Jesus Christ is Lord and your Savior.

"Whosoever therefore shall confess me before men, him will I confess also before my Father which is in heaven. But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven." Matthew 10:32-33

"Jesus answered and said unto him, Verily, verily I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God." John 3:3

"Jesus answered, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of Spirit is spirit." John 3:5-6

"That whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have eternal life. For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved. He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God." John 3:15-18

The 2nd thing: Take this moment, again yes drop everything you're doing and reach out to someone. Be it mother, or father, friend or foe, tell them that you love them. Ask God to bless him/her. I'm not trying to sound cryptic, but it's truth: You don't know when the time will come when you won't be able to tell those people how much you care.

I hope that this message brings you great hope and not sorrow. Hope because Jesus said He would return and any pain or tears will be gone and wiped away :o)

God bless you!

FASTING FOR HOUSEGUESTS.....

Over the last few weeks I have been searching, in my mind, earnestly, to establish a deeper relationship with God. It’s been challenging, and at times I felt a plateau effect. I would feel His presence, but after a while, it would seem as if I could no longer feel Him….hear Him. Let me tell you, it’s been very nerve wrecking.

I have no doubt He’s here with me. God said He would never forsake me- I believe Him. However, I still get nervous and worried whenever I don’t feel or hear Him as much as I did during the previous day or previous week. So what gives?

I came across a book about fasting about a week ago. I purchased the book eager to gather information regarding this concept that is mentioned numerous times throughout the Bible. I’ve always wanted to fast, but just didn’t know how. But now, I would finally have a book to refer to when I began my journey to seek a closer, intimate relationship with my Heavenly Father.

So why did days go by while my book sat on the shelf, unopened? Good question.

Good news is that I’ve started to read that book, Fasting by Jentezen Franklin. Even better, some chapters have piqued my curiosity and have challenged me to ask some very tough questions.

Although I have a desire to seek a closer relationship to God, why haven’t I? What’s really stopping me? I desire to hear Him, but what’s blocking me? Well, I’ve learned that fasting is a sure-fire way to focus on my spiritual journey with Him. Which brings me to the topic of houseguests.

Yes, I said it- houseguests. In one chapter Franklin talks about Abraham receiving a visit from God and His angels one night. Franklins reviews how Abraham rushes over to God and lowers himself to worship Him. Abraham asks God and His angels to stay so that he could wash their feet and prepare a meal. They agree.

Okay, so how awesome would that be to have God as a guest at your door? I must say I would be pretty thrilled to have the great I AM pay a visit to my home. I could see myself now, updating my status on Facebook: “Guess who’s coming to dinner????” But let’s be real- if God came over to my house, would I be ready? Would you? I’ll be honest and sadly admit my answer would “No.”

Over the holidays I had the privilege of playing hostess to my mother who came to visit. Let me tell you, while I was so excited to have my mom visit, I also spent the week prior to her arrival in a state of frenzy- my house had to be spotless! The floors had to be swept, mopped, AND polished. Dishes in the sink??? Oh I don’t think so. I remember going to Wal-Greens to buy an armload of scent plug-in’s and candles. Now don’t get it twisted, I’m not a hoarder; I don’t live in a pigsty. This was my mother for crying out loud! Everything had to be perfect or as close to perfect as my ADD self could allow. Oh yeah, I was so ready for my mom’s arrival.

But what about those guests who just show up? You know, the friends who call you at like 7 at night, right after you finished cooking this massive meal, and want to come over and chat. And where are they? Right around the corner, of course! You freak out as you take in the pots and pans that now clutter your sink and dishwasher. You look around and see toys (in my case it would be dog toys) scattered around the living room. You quickly pray to God for a small miracle as you politely tell your friend, “Sure, of course you can come over! Can’t wait!”

Being on the receiving end of those calls have made me a little wiser to the game: Be prepared as much as possible and stay alert! Sometimes I’m able to do such that and it works in my favor, but sometimes it’s not always the case and I found myself giving out disclaimers such as “Please ignore the mess in my house!” or “Don’t judge me!”

Well what if God paid you a visit. What if it was an unexpected one at that? Would you turn Him away and say “Oohh….yeah, about that- this is really not a good time for me. Wow, you caught me off guard! Let’s try tomorrow or maybe perhaps next week????”

Of course you wouldn’t- He’s God! But talk about the embarrassment you would feel when you had to give Him those same disclaimers: “Heavenly Father, please excuse the mess in my house!” or even better “Abba, please don’t judge me!”

I cringe just thinking about it!

So it brings me back to the concept of fasting. Fasting is a way to not only focus on Him, but to prepare for the unexpected, whether they be good or bad. By fasting you are sacrificing yourself up God, remaining humble and acknowledging how great and worthy He is of your sacrifice and more!

“I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.”

Romans 12:1

Fasting also helps to clear up the fog, as I like to call it. As I previously mentioned, I know God is with me. Through Jesus’ precious gift, the Holy Ghost, I have ties to my Heavenly Father at all times. However, sometimes I feel it’s hard to see Him because I have fogged up the windshield. My fleshly FM station is turned up WAY too loud and I can no longer hear Him. I have to turn the station down…I have to turn ME down. I have been taught that fasting does that. It clears up the fog; it turns down the noise so that I can hear His soothing voice and message.

By hearing His voice, I become prepared. I become ready. It doesn’t matter if I receive a week to prepare for a houseguest or 60 seconds, by focusing on God’s station through fasting, I will be prepared- house cleaned, dishes washed AND stored away- at all times.

Let me stop and state how necessary this is- to me, and to you. This is something that needs to be done. This is something I need to do, I have to do. There are no options. It is vital as saints that we keep ourselves alert and prepared at all times. Jesus teaches about staying alert through the Gospels:

“But know this, that if the goodman of the house had known in what watch the thief would come, he would have watched, and would not have suffered his house to be broken up. Therefore be ye also ready: for in such an hour as ye think not the Son of man cometh.”

Matthew 24:43-44

“But of that day and that hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels which are in heaven, neither the Son, but the Father. Take heed, watch, and pray: for ye know not when the time is.”

Mark 13: 32-33

“And what I say unto you I say unto all, Watch.”

Mark 13: 37

“Watch ye and pray, lest ye enter into temptation. The spirit truly is ready, but the flesh is weak.”

Mark 14: 38

“Blessed are those servants, whom the lord when he cometh shall find watching: verily I say unto you, that he shall gird himself, and make them to sit down to meat, and will come forth and serve them. And if he shall come in the second watch, or come in the third watch, and find them so, blessed are those servants.”

Luke 12: 37-38

“Be ye therefore ready also: for the Son of man cometh at an hour when ye think not.”

Luke 12: 40

I believe that God delights in rewarding us and blessing us. He is such a wonderful and merciful God. We have to be ready and alert to His blessings. We have to be ready to receive them. We have to be ready to invite Him in when He comes. We must stay prepared!

God wants us to seek Him, to establish a closer, intimate relationship with Him. With God, His door is always open. He is always prepared. He is always welcoming. We must extend that same gesture.

So what I’ve learned: I must be prayerful; I must be faithful; I must be prepared; I must be ready. For anything and everything. God is the great I AM, He is the Alpha and Omega. All I have to do rest in Christ, the Holy Spirit, my constant companion. That is all you have to do as well. When we stay alert and prepared, we’ll hear that knock on the door. Most importantly, we’ll be able to answer it and say “What a pleasant surprise! I’m so glad you’re here. Come on in!”

Be blessed saints!

“Rejoicing in hope: patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer;”

(Romans 12:12)

Blessings..

Okay so I actually jotted this down in my journal because I wasn't near a computer. Typically, I get inspired while on the computer or simply near one and just type away, however this wasn't the case this time and I was afraid I would forget what I wanted to say when I finally got to a computer. So backdrop of this reflection: Again, I'm at the point to know and trust that God hears prayers and answers them. It may not look how I want it to look, and the timing may not be aligned with my impatient mental clock, BUT GOD will always deliver. I've never met anyone so consistent. I mean, my own mother is completely awesome-sauce and everything, but GOD is perfect! His timing is impeccable and His judgment is divine!

With this being said, I slowly found myself going into this doubt phase. First, it was doubting that He would answer my prayers, but then it was me doubting if I should accept His answers. I know you're thinking "Why would you doubt a blessing from God??? It's from GOD?!" Well, let me tell you it's easier said than done.

"Ask and you shall receive..." "Knock and the door will be answered...." or something along those lines. Now the BIG questions I had to challenge myself with:

1. Will I take it?

and

2. Will I walk through the open door?

Doubt is such a powerful thing. Even when you are blessed the devil will STILL try and intercept that blessing by placing DOUBT in your mind. I had to land on this difficult practice: DON'T LISTEN TO IT!

I know God answers prayers so why do I doubt HIM when I receive HIS blessing? Well, first I begin to ask "Is it what I want?" then "Should I do it?" and shortly following with "Is it really from Him?" I mean, it seems at every corner I turn, I find this detour called "Doubt" that tries to steer me from embracing my blessings. The last question has been the biggest hurdle to cross, I'll admit. Because I'm really trying to quiet my flesh so that I can hear Him, I find myself doubting that I'm actually receiving a blessing and rather just giving into the desires of my flesh once again. This barrier has challenged me to continue to seek Him and Rest in Christ. How have I been doing this? Reading the Bible. I have always had a very basic, Black/White thought process. Either it is or it isn't. Either it's right or it's wrong. Either I go left or go right. Simplicity at its best. Well, I'm now following this same thought process when it comes to discernment. Either it's in the Bible or it's not. The Bible is God's book for us. It's His messages written through saints who were just like you and me. Some messages are more obvious than others, some more literal than figurative, however it's all there and through prayer and meditation, it's all comprehensible- It all makes sense. I've stop trying to second guess what I think scriptures are trying to say....meaning I've stop attempting to justify my wrong-doing by pulling out a good ol' scripture to support my cause. God doesn't work like that, I realize. He's pretty straightforward. If I don't understand the scripture, I ask for His wisdom and clarity. I ask for His understanding. And while I may have to reread the scripture 10 times before I get what He's saying, I do, in fact, get the message (oh you inpatient mental clock!).

So I've learned that if it ain't in the Book (Bible), then it's not coming from God. If God hasn't given instructions or directions (again, found in the Bible), then I don't need to pay any further attention to it. So to go back to doubting gifts as blessings from God: I've discerned things I receive by checking to see it has a stamp of approval from God. If it don't smell like "Eau de" God, I don't want it. What does God smell like? What does His stamp of approval look like? I don't know, I'm still learning. But what I have come across that I think are great starters:

"And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:7

"Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things." Philippians 4:8

"And now abideth faith, hope, charity***, these three; but the greatest of these is charity." 1 Corinthians 13:13 (*** different versions of the Bible state love in place of charity. I use the King James version and the footnote mentioned this version has provided an inaccurate and misleading translation of this particular scripture. Greek text used the word "agape" which can also mean "love". I do use the term "love" instead of "charity.")

Basically, focus on God. Placing your trust in Him, you will find you will not be led astray because you are being guided by Him. Secondly, figuring out who God is. Now this is a big one, and I think even an impossible task because He is the great "I Am." Words cannot describe Him. What I've done so far is use analogies or comparisons to what I feel He has done for me and who/what he has been to me. He has been loving, so His blessings will reflect that concept. He has been merciful and forgiving, so His blessing will also reflect that. He has been my rock of peace, again His blessing will reflect that. So when I look at an answer I received after I prayed about something, I seek to determine if those concepts are found within the answer: Does this answer promote love? Does this answer promote mercy and forgiveness? Does this answer promote humility and self-less action? Does this answer glorify His name? Finally, does this answer give me peace? One thing I've recognized is that I always feel at peace when I'm actively pursuing my relationship with God. There's another saying along the lines that I may not rejoice in whatever situation I'm in, but in whatever situation I'm in I can rejoice in God. That holds true to the peace He gives me. Despite what I'm going through, He will always provide me peace. And no it's not that elevator-music/spa-day/cool jazz playing/aromatherapy candles type of relaxation. For me, it's been that "My world is upside down, the wind is blowing fervently, the turbulent waves are crashes all around me, HOWEVER I'm standing still. I'm planted on firm ground. I cannot be moved nor be swayed. There is calmness inside of ME....the essence inside of me is calm, at peace. And that is simply because His Holy Spirit is within me. Does this make sense?

So with that being said, if you truly sense He has answered your prayers and it's a blessing, well..... DON'T LOOK SIDEWAYS AT YOUR BLESSING- CLAIM IT!!!! God is good. He wouldn't do anything to hurt us. And while I do feel that whole "be careful what you ask for" is true, I do know God would not grant us something that would harm us or go against His spirit within us. If anything, if God answers a request and the outcome is not favorable in our eyes (again our eyes, not necessarily His), there was a lesson He wanted us to learn through that blessing. And yes I say blessing because anything He gives is a blessing for the simple fact that blessings always turn into growth, progression, and forward-movement! I realized that He may not give me what I want every time; He will give me what I need EVERY time. He is consistent. And honestly, I love His outcome over my own. I love when God "meddles;" He does a FAR better job than I do when I try and insert my own independence. I find myself at peace and happier whenever I let Him take control. I always love His results. Mine? Eh.... it's a hit or miss and even when I like what I did it's never to the fullest, real satisfaction I get when He works.

So my conclusion: I know God has my best interest. He loves me more than I love myself. He knows me better than I know myself. So why question HIM when he answers my prayers. Why question myself when HE answers my prayers? Am I not worthy of His blessings? Well, despite my flaws and imperfection He seems to think so and there's no DOUBT about it!

Resting in Christ

I know it's been forever since I last signed on. Don't worry, things have been good...correction, I've been good. One thing my pastor said that resonates with me: You might not be able to rejoice in whatever situation you are placed. But whatever situation you are placed, you CAN rejoice in God. I cannot describe how God has shown His presence in my life this year....wordy, talkative, verbose me- speechless! Let's just say God has used my circumstances, individuals associated within my life, basically everything to show me how awesome, loving, and completely worthy HE is! Despite some situations I have been placed in, He has turned those daunting factors into reasons why He is worthy to be praised. Am I making sense? I find myself searching for words to properly articulate my thoughts and feelings lately. Words don't seem to measure or truly capture how I've been feeling...how blessed I feel...how at peace I feel. And it's all because of God. So far this year I've learned: 1. Despite how far I venture away, God has and will always be with me. He promised He would never forsake me and He is completely thorough, completely consistent. 2. God answers prayers, I just had to learn how to ask. 3. Sometimes answered prayers don't turn out how I imagined, however they're always, exactly what I wanted (good thing God is God and I'm not, right?). 4)Sometimes God answers prayers by placing me in a situation where I develop my desired outcome. For example, I've asked for patience. At one point my group leader sagely reported sometimes God will provide you with a situation where you have to be patient. As another friend reflected: God doesn't send patience or humility in a cute little jar for you to open up and use. 5) To further expand on number 4, God really does have a great sense of humor...or maybe it's just me (it's not!). 6) There is nothing greater than love because God is love. I believe this is what God is trying to teach us. Or least that what I feel He's been showing me so far this year: Don't judge, unless I want to be judged. Forgive others as I want to be forgiven. Give mercy because He gives so freely and abundantly. Love unconditionally, because His love is unconditional for me. 7) Rest in Christ...Know that He has done it all. While I may not be perfect or complete, I must rest in the fact that in Christ, I am perfect, I am complete, I'm worthy and good enough to have a place with God. And there is Nothing I can do to win a place in heaven; There is nothing I can do to have that place taken away. It is a precious gift! Now please don't misconstrue what I'm saying: just like any other store policy I can always give the gift back, exchange it for something else (worldly, empty things), or simply not extend my hand to receive it. What I've learn is once I've truly accepted and embraced that gift, I cannot damage it. It's not like fine china and once dropped it's broken and destroyed. Nor could I regift it and give it to someone else (ie Dirty Santa game). It's mine and as long as I want it, I believe in it, and I cherish it, it will NEVER go away.

I want to come back to my last few reflections later on and expound on them, particularly numbers 4, 6, and 7.

Until then, please rest easy in Christ: Romans 8:38-39

"For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come. Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."